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The Great Exploits of the LRS
Friday, July 9, 2004
The LRS and America
Now when the settlers from europe landed here there was nothing but vegetation and they were free from religious persecution, but they had a few problems, they had to figure out what food they could eat, how to stop wild animals from getting in their villages, how to survive the winter and stuff like that. So the LRS came in and helped them out by introducing them to the Native Americans, who the LRS had helped along hudreds of years before. So before any one knew it the Natives and the settlers had developed a friendship and upon the LRS suggestion had a thanks giving feast for all they had accomplished. Now you know where thanksgiving really comes from and a hundred years later the americans where fighting a war against the british for independence. When jeffreson was assigned to write the declaration the LRS went and knocked him out with a sleeping agent and wrote it then left. Jeffreson thinking he had written it gave it to the continental congress and the war was on. in the mentime Washington was taken to a private part of Delaware for training by the LRS in military tactics and Paul Revere was asked by an "anonymous" note to warn the americans that the british were coming. and all the battles the Americans lost the LRS was not present at, but they could not loose of the LRS was there. After the LRS and american militia had defeated the red coats they established their government and the LRS pushed for Washington to be president cause thats they way it had to be. And to this day the LRS runs most aspects of the government from behind the scences. Did you know nixon was a robot? They couldn't find any man stupid enough to do the stuff Nixon did. No offense to the Nixon folloing out there. And now you know.

Posted by Squarecow at 2:53 PM MDT
The LRS, Bigfoot, and the Yeti
During WWII Russia was making spies to go into Germany and intercept secret information to help in the war effort. Now russians are kinda weird and the two spies where Apes. One was an albino and the other was brown. So to make sure the animals wouldn't give up any information to the Germans if caught, the russians tortured the heck out of them. Here is only a short list: they cut them with knives and made them drink battery acid, they hung the albino by his fingers from trees for day at a time they beat them, and they rarely fed the brown one, all kinds of sick stuff like that. After the training was completed the russians sent the spies to germany where during the whole war they were never caught. After the war the russians used their spies against america during the cold war. Then when it was revealed to the American Government they sent out their elite squadron of Gov't agents to steal the spies and put them in a better place so the president at the time sent out the LRS which was made up of only two guys whose code names where the Unsung Hero of Time and the Younger Unsung Hero of Time. Together they infiltrated all of russia and quickly found the two spies they then asked where the now retired spies wanted to live the rest of their lives. The albino said he would like to go to the himalayas so thats where he went and the brown one requested to live in america. Then the LRS faked pictures of both and spread the rumor of Bigfoot in america and the yeti in the himalayas all for the sake of giving people who would otherwise kill themselves out of bordem: now have hobbies of chasing down these ex-russian spies. The money these chasers spend on equipment to catch the two goes straight to the LRS, don't ask how, and they have used this money to develop how to travel at the speed of light and warp gates and stuff, thats another story though. And now you know the truth about bigfoot and his brother the yeti.

Posted by Squarecow at 2:51 PM MDT

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